We started our year off rocky. We got into a car accident on New Year's Eve, but luckily enough we all walked away with no bruises. My husband ended up spending sometime in jail, and we ended up with no car. Prior to all this happening, I was able to get 2 jobs. One for delta airlines, and the other for Enterprise rent a car. I remember the week before all this went down I felt so happy because we finally were financially stable with my husband who worked at Frito lay at the time. I was ready to make some money!!!! Heck, I was so ready to make my own money. BUT, of course all this drama happened and just when I felt satisfied something just had to ruin it. My husband ended up losing his job at Frito lay, and I now am the bread winner for our family.
I remember being so frustrated with God at this point. Just when I thought I could finally have it all, he took it away. Just when I finally felt a sense of security, he took it back. I was doing everything he wanted me to do, being a church going saint, and yet.....I felt like he didn't see that...he didn't care...
I never prayed so hard to a God I doubted so bad at the time. All I wanted was to finally be financially stable, and it seemed like it was too much to ask. Then one day I thought about my up bringing. I thought about how we grew up in a stabled home. My dad worked for the courts as a probation officer, and my mom just worked part time at mr. Mac's just to get out of the house. We lived in a big home, had nice cars, and always had great food on the table. We always went on family vacations, and in a nutshell were able to do a lot more than others in our neighborhood. Then, one day my dad decided that he wanted to leave his job that paid great to become an entrepreneur. It was a risky choice, but he was so confident in his dream he finally quit his job of making over 50 grand a year, to making 0$. Just hitting my teen years, I remember my mom crying for the first few years of this new path we were embarking on. It was hard, especially on her. She quit the job she worked at for over 20 years to find a better job to help provide for us and help with my dads dream. My mom began her new journey at beehive clothing where she would sew the garments for our religion. She stood 8 hours a day, 40+ hours a week to make ends meet. The thing I love most about my mom was throughout all of our hardships she always tried to Improve herself as a worker. If she wanted a better position, she worked hard to get it. 8 years later she's now a trainer getting paid much more than what she started out as. My dad is still the most hardest working entrepreneur I know. He has managed to master his native tongue to a T to where he is getting paid to translate...and that's only one of his many jobs. When he's done with his work, he's the one that's home being mom. Cooking, taking care of us, cleaning, all that mom stuff in between. It's been eight years and we're finally so comfortable in where we are at in life.
I guess what I have learned most through out it all was 1- this so called "hardship" that I was going through was actually nothing new to me, I was just being a crybaby! Haha. 2- I was so focused on being the typical "husband is the provider and wife is a stay at home mom" that I didn't realize my mom has been the bread winner for us for quite sometime, which was also not new to me. 3- although my mom and dad switched rolls, they both never belittled one another- they knew that both jobs were still important. They showed me the blessing of going against the stereotype. 4- it's not about the money, never was about the money. I seriously think that God put us in these positions to realize what our core focus and foundation needed to be- and it was him. Nothing more, nothing less.
5- always be optimistic!!!! Of a things this was one thing I am very good at. My sister always tells me I'm just like my dad. The absolute worst could be happening and we'd always be able to see the good in it. The more I stayed positive- the more I was able to keep myself going everyday!
6- God can't help a hardened heart. For those times I wasn't optimistic and full of doubt- I prayed. Prayer has helped me so much in my life. It has taught me to stay humble and has softened my heart every time I was on my knees. Being able to communicate with God and just know that I wasn't going through this alone helped me strive to keep going and to keep progressing.
7- to love my husband unconditionally. For good or bad, better or worse- I signed my heart to him eternally. We've definitely switched rolls of him being mom and I'm being dad- but it has humbled us a lot just to be able to see each other's perspectives, and also has strengthen our marriage! It will be 3 years on February 3rd, and I am truly grateful to still be riding with my love!
I've learned mostly to enjoy the struggle. Everything that I am going through now I will one day look back and be grateful that what I have gone through has only strengthened me and my family. It's a minor setback for a major comeback, and the year has just started which means that there is so much I can improve on! So bring it 2015, I am so ready for ya!
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