I'm still on the learning curve. I have a lot to learn, and one of them is how to stop pleasing others. I hated when people didn't like me. Or when they had something to say about me. I don't know why, but It always kept with me throughout my day...and the feeling sucked. I always tried to look at it as a way to motivate, or to improve myself. But by the end of the day, I still felt down and out. No matter if I did change, someone will always have something to say.
I've been married for 10 months now, and I have already learned a lot. Motherly duties, wife expectations, how to raise a family, and although I'm not perfect at it, I am better at managing it, than managing how to take others opinions about me. A lot of times I try to avoid the problem, and keep focus on other things. But no matter how busy I can get, it stays in the back of my mind, and continues to be the reminder that I don't need. When I do confront the problem, a skill that I learned from my dad, which 99% of the time works. It always seems to end up bigger.
I guess the real problem here is I allow it to get to me, and that would have to be a skill I need to practice on. "Choosing my battles." Although we fight battles daily, I guess it's up to me on choosing the battle worth fighting for. I want to be able to please everyone, but in order to, I have to be able to be satisfied with myself. Don't get me wrong, I love myself truly, but just like every human being in this world, I have to be able to love myself so much, that words won't break me no matter how many times it is thrown at me...and I guess to love myself truly, I have to know my purpose here, and constantly remind myself my purpose.
Everything's always easier said, than done. And just like life, I don't expect it to be easy. But because I know how precious life is, I know it's worth it.
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